This topic is now called my poems because I am adding moree! I feel like it :P

Last edited by elizabethrose34 on 3/2/2011, 5:38 pm; edited 1 time in total

Here's my poem I wrote in Social Studies class a few weeks ago! (It sort of stinks, by the way)

They stare me down, eternally
those clear, innocent blue eyes
like a looking glass.
Such a lie these eyes have told;
pain infliction,words
that meant more
than he may ever realize,
nevertheless care about.
Those eyes, such lies,
penetrate my very soul.
Never revealing any signs
of my torture.

Yeah, sorta depressing.

ooohh good ^_^

Guest

Amazehn xD

Ohh thank you (:
I'm writing another what should be much better one soon soooooooooooooooooo yeah.

Bra vo grate

Last edited by elizabethrose34 on 3/2/2011, 8:24 pm; edited 1 time in total

I wrote this in my social studies class... a lot of my work comes out of this. But this is just rough, not much editing has been done, the idea popped into my head and I simply HAD to right it. Again, it's rough, the vocab isn't very good, but here you go: (it's title-less for now)

The day I watched my sister die,
was the day I finally realized,
the reality of my situation.
Day after day kept my worries at bay,
but the truth still loomed,
over me, over she,
over the world that we
had lived the entirety of our lives inside.
The memories still linger in my brain.
The shouts. Oh, the SHOUTS! How they echoed through the air.
The puppies cried, oh how loudly they cried, causing quite a scare.
But it was too late.
The shot rang Rang RANG! through the square.
And I'm afraid the truth was far more
than I could bear.
The rebellion starts today.
And today is the day that my life shall end,
disregarding the calls from foe or friend.
I plan to give my life, to die
for I cannot forget my dear sister's cries.
I bid this world goodbye.

Woooooow O.O You have a few excess words in there, but overall thats like freakishly amazing.

Thank you (: I read your poems and they're all REALLY good, but I never got around to commenting on them, I wish I did :/. They're awesome. I was typing this up fast and realized I made some typos Razz

xD

Minor God Posts : 8306 Join date : 2011-01-14 Age : 27

good good no great hehe they are awesome

O.O ....a little depressing.... but it was good.

Thanks! Here's my poem that I started again, during Social Studies. Don't ask me why xD. It's actually gonna be used for my English class. The diction isn't too great, but it's meant to be sort of simple.

There once was a girl
with a light blonde curl,
and emerald eyes that glint in the sun.
One day she visited a shop
to buy a car and a top
for the little boy who lived next door.
So she got in her car,
and drove pretty far,
when she arrived it was a bit late.
She walked down the halls,
with the murals on their walls,
'till she got to the door with his name.
She opened it up,
sat down next to the pup
who visited him throughout the day.
And she gave him the toy
to this he yelled "Oh joy!"
His eyes lit up like bulbs in a socket.
So they talked and they talked,
and would've taken a walk,
but sadly he was far too tiresome.
When she left she was sad,
and just a bit mad,
for she felt no kid should have to go through that.
She went home, took a rest
with much pain in her chest,
it was now that she would make a difference.
She went back every day
to help in every which way,
but in the end it was all inevitable.
The boy, he did die,
and many did cry,
a decision was made that dreary morn.
One thing was sure,
they would try and find a cure,
no matter how long it would take.
For why should anyone live that way?

I have 2 more, I'm pretty sure no one really cares and they're not that good but I figured I'd post them because I feel like it ^.^.
This one is quite simplistic and I don't know why I came up with the idea for it, but here you go:

Rock my dear baby,
fall right to sleep.
Your world is so peaceful now,
no need to weep.

Oh, my dear baby,
how tranquil you are.
I hope you are never forced to realize
our world's true scar.

Look at yourself, dear baby,
so fragile and innocent.
How I wish the real world
is oh so magnificent.

You tire dear baby,
but you're not aware.
The wars, the crimes,
they all cause quite a scare.

Innocent are you, dear baby.
Not frightened, forlorn.
The world is full of horrors.
Such evil, such scorn.

Fall to sleep you do, dear baby.
Escape from reality.
Sweet dreams, calm rest.
Preserve your morality.

Be safe, dear baby.
Stay strong.

And here's the second one. It was originally written for a school contest but I didn't enter. I didn't really proofread these two too much so I'm sorry if they stink. :$

Forgiveness.

Such a simple term for such a difficult deed.
But why is that so?

Is it that people have such hatred towards their neighbor,
as they have towards the man the don't even know?

Is it that they fear they may look weak?

Is it for fear of retaliation?

Or, is it simply for they are too cowardly to do so?

Forgiveness takes courage, and it also takes heart.

You may think,
how is it that I can love the one who has hurt me?

To many it may seem
implausible, impossible,
not even worth giving a second thought.

But when you love your supposed enemy,
you convey far more strength than the man who holds the grudge.

Forgiveness may seem difficult,
but it is good, and evident in your soul.

Since people are posting work I FORGOT ABOUT MY NEW POEM asdfgh so I figured I'd post it here because I can. EXCUSE the poems up there, as a lot of them are crappy xDD I think I showed some people this but I can't remember xP

Anyhoo, here ya go:

"Summer's Angel"

He has fallen,
avenging angel of summer's essence,
longing for the sun to warm his being,
hold it tightly in its warm, homey presence.
He has fallen,
seasons stoically passing through their phases,
wind turning crisp, breeze strong,
gone the sun, and hence the moon raises.
He has fallen,
leaving mere perceptions of a primal creation,
which diminish as he flutters away,
his life leaving, bringing with it no real salvation.
He has fallen,
eradicable, dilute, he does go,
dead and unresponsive,
crumpling with frost before impending snow.
He has fallen,
to be revived, in time,
soul lingering silently until melting commences,
when it will reemerge, sublime.
He has fallen.
But he will rise again.

Ooooo. I like that one. It makes me feel hopeful, with the ending.

WHY ARE YOU SO GOOD AT WORDS, MAX?

AKSUGHRKAGKUYG SO MUCH AWESOME AND DEPTH AND DHGUHHGKUDH.

Guest

/strokes chin

Hmm... pretty good. ^^;

Thank you, guys! :3
/legrammarnaziinsideofmyisworryingabouttheplacementofthatcomma
WHATEVER

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